Understanding the Impact of Deployment on Children
Military deployment is one of the most challenging experiences for defence families, especially for children. When a parent deploys, kids may experience a range of emotions - from worry and sadness to confusion and even anger. As ADF families, understanding these feelings and having practical strategies can make a significant difference.
Practical Tips to Help Your Child Cope
1. Maintain Open Communication
Create a safe space for your child to express their feelings. Ask open-ended questions like "How are you feeling about Dad/Mum being away?" and listen without judgment. Validate their emotions by saying things like "It's okay to feel sad" or "I miss them too."
2. Keep Routines Consistent
Children thrive on routine, especially during times of change. Maintain regular meal times, bedtimes, and family activities as much as possible. This predictability provides comfort and security.
3. Stay Connected with the Deployed Parent
Use video calls, letters, care packages, and photos to help maintain the connection. Create a countdown calendar together, or have a special bedtime ritual like reading a story the deployed parent recorded.
4. Use Age-Appropriate Explanations
Explain deployment in terms your child can understand. For younger children (4-8), keep it simple: "Mummy/Daddy has an important job helping people and will be away for a while, but they love you very much."
5. Create Memory Projects
Help children feel connected by creating photo albums, drawing pictures to send, or making a special deployment journal where they can write or draw their thoughts.
6. Connect with Other Defence Families
Knowing other kids going through similar experiences helps children feel less alone. Seek out ADF family support groups or playgroups in your area.
7. Watch for Warning Signs
Be alert to changes in behavior, sleep patterns, or school performance. If you notice persistent issues, reach out to family support services or a counselor who understands military family dynamics.
Resources to Support Your Child
While these strategies can help, sometimes children benefit from stories that help them understand and process their feelings about deployment. That's why we created Sea Sky Land: The Adventures Begin.
This book is specifically designed for defence connected children aged 4-10, offering engaging stories that help kids navigate the challenges of military life - from deployments to postings and separations. Through fun adventures, children learn resilience and see that other kids understand what they're going through.
Many ADF families have found that reading together creates opportunities for conversations about deployment in a safe, age-appropriate way.
Learn more about Sea Sky Land here
You're Not Alone
Remember, deployment is challenging, but ADF families are resilient. By using these strategies and accessing available resources, you can help your child not just cope, but grow stronger through the experience. The Australian Defence Force offers family support services, and connecting with your local Defence Community Organisation can provide additional resources and support.
What strategies have worked for your family during deployment? We'd love to hear your experiences.